Watch for video on the iPhone and a new Tablet – for starters.

Apple could do a lot of things that would surprise us. It could announce it is buying an iceberg the size of Cupertino, Calif. Apple marketing chief Phil Schiller could launch a line of barbecue sauce. Steve Jobs could emerge, carrying the new iPhone and a stool, and put on a ventriloquist act. “Boom. I’m the new iPhone, and when I talk I sound just like Steve Jobs. Palm, I kill you,” Jobs might say. None of those things will happen, of course. Apple ( AAPL – news – people ) has nudged expectations for its Worldwide Developers Conference in San Francisco Monday so low that anything would be a surprise–which is exactly where Apple wants us to be. That’s because Apple isn’t in the computer business, it’s in show business. The only question: What act are we in? That’s because the biggest surprises from Apple over the next year will be when, not what. Take the biggest drama at Apple right now: Jobs’ health. He is slated to return to Apple at the end of June after a six-month medical leave. A cameo appearance by Jobs Monday offers nothing Apple hasn’t already promised, it just delivers it early. And if it happens, Apple developers, customers and shareholders will love it. – From Forbes